The Importance of Being Honest

 

Recently I was blindsided by some revelations about a man of God that I highly respect. He was caught in some behavior that was not only sinful, but also abusive to others. My heart ached with disappointment when I found out. Suddenly everything that I’d ever learned from him was at risk, and it wasn’t just because of his secret sin.

This man had lied when confronted with this sin. Instead of humbling himself, revealing his error, and seeking restorative help, he had emphatically denied it. He’d acted as if he were the victim. And I’d been just one of the people he’d deceived. Low blow.

For weeks I struggled through the pain of this betrayal, finally coming to the conclusion that it would have been far easier to process and to forgive if he’d only have been honest.

Honesty seems like such a simple concept, yet somehow this simple concept gets convoluted along life’s messy path.

We want our kids to always tell the truth, but we chastise them when the truth comes out of their mouth in a way that points out our flaws or embarrasses us.  We almost expect our teenagers to lie and sometimes we even brush it off as a need for privacy. And when is the last time that you greeted someone with “How are you?” and expected them to answer honestly?

It seems that the culture we live in and our chosen circle of influence begin to determine what honesty really means to us.

In no place is this more remarkably seen than in the Church. The lack of authenticity allowed in our sanctuaries is a contributing factor to the mass exodus of our next generation. We like to talk about truth, preach truth, and market truth without actually living it. There are very few churches in existence in America where one can leave their masks at home and come as they really are.

We often mistakenly believe that church is the place to be spiritual, not honest. We want to make sure no one knocks us off the “They’re obviously a Christian” list. We are like children that have been told to clean up our room and instead of taking the time and effort to deal with the mess, we just shove it into closets or under the bed. The room looks clean, but the mess has just been relocated.

Mess is uncomfortable, but the honest truth is that we are all a mess in some way or another.

This might be why we have so many unhealthy, struggling, tired, mentally ill Christians sitting in our churches. Everyone wants to pretend that Jesus saves us right out of the mess, forgetting that He came right down into it to help us clean it up. Truth is, we were called to live in mess, just like He did.

First, He helps us clean up our own and then we are called to help others clean up theirs…but if there isn’t any mess around us, we likely aren’t doing our job.

Why is it that we would rather disguise ourselves as full-grown adult Christians than actually grow up in Christ? Why is it that we would rather sit back and judge others than love and help them? It’s the mess. No one likes it. I don’t like it. You don’t like it. The preacher doesn’t like it. The person next to you is really uncomfortable with it. And the ushers and greeters would much rather have perfection and excellence.

Everyone likes perfect. Even in the Church…especially in the Church.

We don’t want to deal with broken and messy in others. It reminds us of all the ways we are broken and messy ourselves. We want to be the “chosen people”. God’s “righteous ones”. The people who were handpicked because something must be better about us.

We want to think that we get into Heaven because we are perfect…at everything.

The truth is that this stunts our growth as believers…this insistence on covering up the mess. It’s like putting on a beautiful, brand new outfit over a body that you haven’t cleaned in years. You can cover up some things, but you still stink…and you may not be able smell yourself, but you can be sure that others can smell you.

We’ve run off many a potential convert with our beautified stench.

Honesty is crucial to our relationship with Jesus…its crucial to all of our relationships, really, but especially the one with Him. He created us (Gen. 1:27). He knows us through and through (I Sam. 16:7). He has purpose for us (Eph. 2:10). He loves us so much that He died for us (Jn 3:16).

And we still try to lie to Him all the time.

We want to hide our mess…hide our smell…hide our true feelings from Him…like He doesn’t already know exactly where we are and what we are thinking. Like Adam and Eve, we cower behind the bushes, hoping that the Creator of the Garden won’t find us.

And it’s to us He calls, “Christian, where are you?” Not because He doesn’t know where we are, but because He knows that as soon as we answer Him, we will start to understand how silly it was to try to hide from Him in the first place.

In John 8:32, Jesus told the Jews who were believing on Him that they would know the Truth and the Truth would make them free. This wasn’t because the Truth is like a magic spell that you can quote to set yourself free, rather it was because Truth is the revealing of God’s Design.

When we operate on this earth according to God’s design for us, we become whole and free. Truth is the superhighway that leads us straight to freedom.

The roadblocks that we find in our lives on that highway are caused by the enemy’s lies and his deception. It’s the only play he’s got when we come to Christ…to slow us down and make us ineffective. He will do everything possible to get you outside of God’s design and the tool he uses more than any other is deception and dishonesty.

“Did God really say…?” “He just doesn’t want you to be happy.” “You don’t want to serve that kind of God, do you?” “Let’s just tweak a few little things.”

Sound familiar?

The enemy wants you deceived because it blocks your calling. And the only way to avoid that deception is through honesty.

Sometimes, we fully believe we are telling the truth, but we are truly just hiding behind the bushes. God wants us to come out and meet with Him face to face. It’s only when we experience His great love and mercy that we understand there was never anything to hide from in the first place.

Our God is for us…the real us…the honest us.