I came across some old journals the other day while cleaning out a storage area at the house. As I skimmed through them, I noticed something that, honestly, shocked me. Journal after journal, day after day, year after year, I didn't change much at all. I prayed the same prayers. Felt the same feelings. Stayed stuck in the same ruts. Time did nothing for my growth or healing except taunt me. I wanted to change, but I thought it would be something God would do for me when He was ready. I waited...and waited...and waited. I'd still be waiting today if I hadn't learned that God had already given me everything that I needed to grow and to change.
But I had to move. It is my responsibility to exercise the resources that He has given. It is my job to search for the answers, learn about His design, and implement the habits into my life that contribute to long-term growth. Of course, I don't have to do this alone. He provides direction, encouragement, and connections along the way. But I do have the responsibility to move.
One of the first things I learned about movement is that it doesn't happen without intentional planning. I've always been a "fly by the seat of my pants" type of person. I loved nothing more than to wake up and let life happen to me. At least I loved it until what was happening to me created all kinds of suffering in my life. Being a free spirit sounds better than it feels sometimes. And even free spirits need structure and boundaries.
For a long time, I thought that changing meant I needed to get rid of my God-given personality all together. In my first attempts at planning, I tried to structure every moment of every day. I watched and tried to emulate people who had their stuff together or at least had me convinced that they did. I wore myself out trying to tame myself into a version that would look fully grown. I didn't realize in doing this, I'd skipped all the actual growth. I was dying inside a good-looking shell.
See, change requires intentional movement, but intentional movement requires authenticity to be healthy. We have to take into account the way God uniquely designed us before we can grow into all He created us to be. We aren't all cross-fitters. Some of us are pickle ball players. Some of us are walkers or runners. The healthiest growth will not change your personality. It will enhance it.
So yes, I still use a planner. I'm stagnant without it. It's my way to be intentional. I start every week by brain dumping what I need to get done, what I want to work on and work towards, what habits I am implementing (and yes, I track them daily). And I begin most mornings with God and this planner. I write down threeish things from that brain dump list that I hope to accomplish that day. I review my habits. I find the good that I am going to cling to. And suddenly I am moving forward...with purpose.
One more thing about movement that I've learned the hard way. Movement doesn't have to be large leaps to be effective. As a matter of fact, consistent baby steps often get you much further than large leaps. I used to begin my year listing out all the goals and changes I want to make...and it was always a long list. Then I'd work really hard maybe until February when I'd run out of steam and give up. The next year, I'd have the same exact list, begging God for more strength and ability to accomplish it, wondering why He wasn't answering when He knew changing me would be better for everyone. It took me a long time to learn that slow and steady wins the race.
Now I begin my year with a limited amount of goals that I want to accomplish. I can't change everything, but I can change something. And I break those goals down into the smallest steps possible. And often, I turn those small steps into habits...things that I do daily to get to where I am going. Now, when I look back on my year, I am floored at how much I have accomplished when it felt like I was barely inching along.
Small movements not only count. They add up to total life change if they are consistent.
I've told you my story. What about yours? Are you growing? Are you moving in the right direction? Did you know that you already have the resources available to you that you need to change? I would love to share with you so many of the things that I've learned in my journey to change my life. It's not only possible to change and grow, it's not as hard as you've convinced yourself that it is.
You can take the first baby step today. My course "Resource Your Health, Change Your Life" is packed full of online video lessons (5-20 min long) that will teach you and remind you of all the resources you already have, their benefits, and ways to work them into your life. I also offer coaching programs to help you know where to start and give you the help you need to be consistent. I've tried to make this investment into yourself affordable and comprehensive. It's self-paced and laid out in a way that is easy to navigate.
My journals these days are not only more authentic then they've ever been, but they are full of the ways that I am learning and winning. I love the growth and direction that I've built into my life with the resources God has given me. If you don't have that in your life, I want it for you, too.
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